On idiotic crushes

I love Steve Sandvoss and I want to bear his children.

Okay, that was a bit simplistic and a trifle exaggerated. Let me exposit. I just saw a movie called "Latter Days," rented via Netflix about...oh...forever and a month ago. Minus the forever. I got Netflix because it was more economically viable than continually paying late fees at the local Hollywood Video, which is a 45-minute commute from where I live and therefore very inconvenient now that I'm out of school. Who wants to sit in a subway for an hour and a half just to rent a fucking movie? (I almost capitalized the Subway, and it's worth noting being forced to watch people eat overlarge sandwiches for an hour and a half just to rent a movie would not only suck, but reeks of unacceptable surrealism.) Anyway, I keep putting off watching the damn movies due to a lack of time, so in reality they're costing me something like seven bucks each. Did I ever mention that I'm a goddamn lazy artard?

Getting back to the point, in "Latter Days" Steve Sandvoss plays a rather sweet-faced Mormon boy who happens to be gay. He discovers and eventually accepts his sexuality over the course of the movie. If you happen to be Mormon...what are you doing reading my blog anyway? Depart this palace of sodomy and sin! Depart before it sucks you in! Depart and read nothing herein! Okay, so you don't have to be Mormon to realize that being gay and Mormon is kind of like being gay and right-wing Republican...and we all know how well drag and George Bush go together (although, admittedly, that's a rather amusing mental image.) So, the movie's pretty much about how he comes to terms with himself, and how his true romance comes to terms with how meaningless his party-boy lifestyle really is.

It's a low budget film and the script is hardly Pulitzer-prize material, but I found it generally rather enjoyable. Not just because there are legions of gorgeous semi-naked men (I seem to recall having had this discussion earlier), but because I actually did find the movie holding a certain resonance. However, it did feel a little like they were trying to cram three and a half hours of storytelling into an hour and a half. The script and scene-work was choppy like a Ginsu. I was also uninspired by most of the performances, although as I said Steve did a rather good job. I may be slightly influenced, however, by his wholesome, corn-fed, disgustingly attractive boy-next-door good looks (which could turn the heads of straight men and bull-dykes alike!) Actually, that can't be it - his co-star, Wes Ramsey, was arguably just as good looking, and I thought his performance campy and a bit forced.

One point of unintentional hilarity, however, were all the shots where someone would have been naked but for some very cleverly angled cameras and well-placed limbs. It was pretty skillfully done, and the actors didn't look like contortionists or anything, but I still found it profoundly funny how often we would have gotten a faceful of penis but for that errant wrist or convenient shadow.

I can't say it's a great movie, but it is pretty good and I would recommend it to my gay friends and anyone who isn't bothered by copious amounts of man-ass.